A couple weeks ago I wrote about belonging in the workplace and mentioned someone who once told me, “sometimes I don’t even recognize myself” because of who she felt she had to be at work. As with many who find themselves in this situation, she left that company and from what I can tell, is excelling in her new position.

I know this is a question that crosses your mind on occasion, is the grass greener? When should I move on? Should I stay or should I go?

I don’t know the answer to that question but, I do believe there are a few things you need to know before you can make that decision. First, you need to be very clear about what you want in the future and second, you need to have clear perspective about your current situation. Rarely is leaving a company just to leave, a good idea.

I am often surprised that people have no idea what their career looks like down the road. I have always been a planner and for the most part, very clear about what I wanted to achieve. I am realizing, through my coaching clients that this is not the case for most people and am discovering that many people leave their career to fate. No judgement. For many, it works out just fine.

“Begin with the end in mind” ~Franklin Covey

What is your vision for your career? Where do you see yourself in 5, 10 years? It’s important to be very clear about what you want in the future. Having this clarity will allow you to make more intentional decisions. There are many tools that can help you to get clarity, see other resources below. Your vision does not have to be based on a particular title or specific position, it can be based on your values or any number of other things that you might use to define your own success.

Begin by looking out 10 years - what will be important to you at this point in your career? What do you want to be doing? What do you want to have accomplished? What will you need financially?

Once you are clear on the 10 year mark (yes, it might change), what will you need to be doing in five years to accomplish your 10 year plan? Back this up with, what will you need to be doing in the next 3 - 5 years? And finally what do you need to accomplish in the next year to get you to your 3 year goal?

“If you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there.” ~ Cheshire Cat, Alice in Wonderland

Now that you have clearly defined what you want in the future, it is time for you to get perspective on your current situation. This is an important step in which you may need to challenge some of your current beliefs.

Is what you want available at the company in which you work?

If yes, how confident are you that you will be successful in getting what you want within the timeframe you have identified?

If no, what is keeping you in your current job?

Sharon (a client / name changed) is often told she is doing a good job, always exceeds expectations on performance reviews, and has been told she is high potential, but does not get promoted. She doesn't stop doing a good job but is burning out and losing the joy she used to find in doing her job. She resents the fact that she is working so hard for a company that is getting high performance from her, (especially compared to her peers) and not getting validation through promotion.

Are you able to substitute your name in place of “Sharon” and completely relate? This is a very common scenario.

Sharon was able to get clear about her what she wanted to achieve in the next 5, 10 years and felt as though it was available to her at her current company. However, she was so strongly tied to the idea that being promoted was directly related to how valuable she was to the company and that it should be done because it is “the right thing to”, that it created a lot of disappointment and resentment within her. Sharon is not alone in this belief. Many people believe that their leader will promote them based on performance.

What do you believe the role of your leader is in your development? What story are you telling yourself about what is “supposed” to happen? How true is your story? How attached are you to that story? How well is that story working for you? What is this story holding you back from? How might you change this story to something that gives you better results?

In Sharon’s case, she agreed to challenge her though of her value being tied to promotion. A small step but, untying the two will allow her the opportunity to see value and performance independent of each other and ultimately see that she has control over both, giving her the ability to make more intentional decisions.

Other Resources

Guide to Finding Your True Purpose

Don’t Quit Your Job Before Asking Yourself There Questions

4 Moves to Make if You Still Have No Idea What You Want to Be When You Grow Up

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